I apologize for not posting last Sunday. Life gave me a good 'ol kick in the tookus. I will try to post another one this Sunday, but don't hold your breath. Just giving a fair warning to the crippling few who give my blog a sidewards glance.
One of the hardest things to do as future mortician, daughter, granddaughter, sister, and a friend is not only accepting the fact that YOU will die, but the one's you love and/or care about will die as well. I find it extremely difficult since I've yet to experience a loss of someone truly close to me, blood or not(knock on wood!) I almost feel strange ascending toward a field where I don't personally understanding losing, grieving, and actually facing a deceased loved one. Almost like giving someone sexual advice when you have yet to experience sex yourself.
I'm not saying or implying that I want to experience it, the losing and grieving, that is. I just don't know how I would handle it. And, that's the frightening part. I spend most of my time, advocating for death positivity and yet, I haven;t experience how darkly death can make you feel, how you feel like you lost a part of yourself, why most people fear it.
Doesn't that sound strange to you? Would you really give your faith as well as your money to a tattoo artist who doesn't have tattoos? Or maybe to a parachutist who has never jumped from an aircraft? Is it enough to only be knowledgeable in the field of Funeral Services?
I don't think I'll ever be ready for death of someone close to me; nobody is.
Feel free to write your experience on grieving or your apprehension about it. Whatever tilts your casket.
Until next time,
chubbyofthedead
